School again!

hey.. it's school again tomorrow.. huh,, actually I've started school since thursday (additional classes) but tomorrow school'll starts oficially.. it'll be boring.. argh.. hating school..

..something I wrote when i was bored

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i have to get over it.. think too much about something.. worry to much over something that couldn't be changed...blaming myself..angry to myself..it drives me crazy. got me depressed. Cayo mai! gambatte! 8(^_^) (smiley's doing thumb's up)

pray for me.. some people said my dreams are too big.. so hard to achieve.. said I won't achieve them... I wanna prove that I can.. I keep on praying.. cause I really wanna achieve all of them... really really.. i'm aware it's so hard.. near impossible.. but still... i want it! i'm lovin' it :)
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that's all.. I'm a boring person ..hush

my parents aren't here.. they go to Kelantan (a state in north malaysia)... they took the flight!! I'm jealous over my sisters who go there too.. huhuh.. what's wrong with me? .. maybe I'll skip school tomorrow.. my bro'll take me to school tomorrow with my fellow sisters that don't go to kelantan.. huhuh.. I have many sisters.. hmm.. my parents have gone for 3 days.. we r enjoying ourselves here.. buying snacks..many of them indeed.. watch tv all the times..haha.. watch harry potter.. watch spy kids again.. and when I'm bored.. I'll reread harry potter and the order of the phoenix.. haha.. what's wrong with me? urgh.. feel stupid.. pardon me.. feel very stupid..

oh some more that I wrote..
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written on 12th June eve…

I don’t understand. What do you want to tell me actually...? I couldn’t figure it out. What’s this all about? Am I missing something? ( my addition now: wrote this becos my friend's telling me something that I couldn't understand.. something regarding her problems.. I wanna help)
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I want to be real tough… though I won’t feel guilty if I cried sometimes… I’ll permit myself to do that... because crying is not a sign of weakness... It gives me strengths...
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I hate my friends because they never understand... I hate my siblings because they detest me... I hate my teachers because they don’t care… but mostly I hate myself because I’m too weak... too afraid to face my own problems… I hate myself because I hate everyone… although they all are innocent. Shouldn’t blame them... but I can’t help it... I created false reasons to hate them... just to satisfy my anger... My anger towards myself
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I’m a hypocrite person. I hate it. I become like this... because people made me do it... be someone else... and now it’s hard to be myself again… do whatever I want... do what ever I think is right.. I’m a totally different person... I can’t recognize myself now... Who am I...?.. and why am I blaming others? Weren’t all these my own choices?
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okay.. that's truly all.. haha.. someother day I'll add more.. well.. I know they aren't something that anyone wanna read.. but I wanna put it up anyway.. I don't care.. this is my bloggggg!